AUTHOR: Carolyn Savage | POSTED: July 29, 2013 | COMMENTS: 8 Comments
CATEGORIES: Authentic Life, Blogging Honestly, Faith, Focusing on The Joy,
Last week was our annual Michigan week. Every summer we carve a week out of our schedule and set up camp at my parent’s home. Like last year, it was the girls and I for most of the week. The boys joined us just in time for the weekend and some unseasonably cooler temperatures.
Low temperatures aside we had a wonderful time. There’s something about my week in the woods…next to the lake…that is simply serene.
Now…about that pit.
was is a pit…and it’s growing…in my stomach. Frankly, this pit has caught me so off-guard that it’s hard for me to get a grip on how it’s effecting my days. I know where it’s coming from, though. You see, we are three weeks and counting to the day we take Drew off to college. I know I’ve written this a thousand times but please humor me as I make it one thousand and one. I’m so excited for him to go. I know he has to go. I wouldn’t want him not to go.
I don’t want him to go.
I’m sure for those of you who’ve “been there done that” it does. For the rest of you, believe me when I say that preparing to send your first born off to school is a mixed bag of anticipation and dread. As I made my way home yesterday, I could feel the noose on his inevitable exit from our daily lives tightening. I know I’ll get through this, but these weeks of dorm shopping and college prep are going to be bittersweet.
Adding fuel to the fire, I think our week at the lake exacerbated my emotions about Drew leaving. Lake Michigan holds so many memories of my son’s childhoods. In a way, I’m redoing so much of what we did with Drew and Ryan with Mary Kate and the girls.
Doing the things the boys loved to do with our girls is such a blessing. At the same time, it causes a flood of memories to wash over me which is followed by some sort of shock. How did time pass so quickly? How is it my sons are so grown up? Did I do everything with them I wanted to?
Of course, I’m managing this pit. I swear I will keep it in check so as not to damper Drew’s excitement about leaving for college. The last thing I want to do is burden him. So. I’ll carry this pit hoping it subsides. I’m pretty damn sure it will. I’ve had pits about little boys before and low and behold–they’ve turned into blessings.
I’m counting on future blessings. I have faith they will come.