Time + Experience = Perspective (Plus a Pregnancy Update!)

AUTHOR: | POSTED: May 25, 2011 | COMMENTS: 10 Comments

Carolyn Savage

Apparently, I am nesting.  Between the yard work, the preparations in the nursery, and the crazy undertaking of a graduation party for Ryan’s eighth grade class, my “to-do” list is growing with every project.  (Why is it that whenever you start one project…it leads to another more expensive or more time consuming task?)  I had a lot of items that needed to be checked off my list last week, but probably the best one was taking the day and driving to see Jennifer and meet her ob/gyn last Wednesday.  It was a three and a half hour trek (one way) so I had a lot of time to think about what to do next, as I counted the corn fields that flitted by as I made my way through America’s heartland. 

Instead of going straight to the doctor’s office, Jennifer and I decided to do what any self-respecting set of girlfriends would do….we went out for lunch.  (My mom and my aunts taught me early on, to never pass by an opportunity to “lunch” with a friend.  It’s truly a simple indulgence that is always worth it!)  Once we had settled at our table, I looked at her and couldn’t believe what I was seeing.  She was truly glowing.  In spite of the fact that our daughters are invading her little body, not only protruding out in front of her, but literally stretching out of her sides, she looked beautiful.  Pregnancy truly does agree with her. 

After lunch, I accompanied her to meet her ob/gyn.  Her doctor was a quiet man with a gentle tone.  I could see right away why she likes him so much.  His demeanor is a great match for hers.  While I sat there and listened, however, I couldn’t help but reminisce about the appointment in which I invited Shannon to accompany me during my pregnancy with Logan.  You see, even though our relationship with Jennifer was entered into willingly (we all knew what we were agreeing to do with a potential surrogacy journey), I admit my presence at her appointment still felt a tad intrusive.  When Jennifer’s doctor asked me if I had any questions—and I did—it felt a little out-of-bounds to be asking them.  I can’t imagine how horribly awkward Shannon must have felt while at a similar appointment with me,  given that we had both been thrown into a situation that neither of us had wanted or agreed to.  I remember reading in Shannon’s book that she felt like a third wheel during that appointment and I was hurt.  But, I totally get it now.  Interesting how time and experience renders perspective.

Jennifer continues to do well with the pregnancy.  She will be 26 weeks along tomorrow which is still a surreal reality for Sean and me.  Jennifer never complains about how uncomfortable she is and I know this can’t be pleasant (I mean, let’s face it.  There are two of them in there and to make matters more challenging we’ve been told these girls aren’t …well…the “daintiest” little ladies.)  I think about and pray for Jennifer all the time.   She is truly a generous soul and a real trooper.  Sean and I have been truly blessed by having her in our lives. 

Please keep Jennifer and the girls in your prayers.  More frequent updates will be coming as we enter into the third trimester in a couple of weeks! 


Baby A stroking her sister’s face!  (Or possilby polking her sister in the face?  Have the twin antics already begun?) 

10 Comments on “ Time + Experience = Perspective (Plus a Pregnancy Update!) ”

  • Ulrike | May 26th, 2011 2:40 am

    So many memories coming back to the time when I was pregnant with Marie and Sophia when I look at the ultrasound pictures on top. The only concern that I had at that time was to get in this pregnancy as far as possible. I had them at 37 weeks, which is considered full term, but Marie was not really ready to be born. She had no interest in eating at all. So, already then, her twin sister had to get the milk going, and then little Marie was willing to nibble somewhat. It was so much work: feeding, pumping, changing diapers. By that time it was almost time to start feeding them again — and I was single and had two other children.
    I have no idea how I did it, but I did it and I loved every instant of it!

    Raising twins really is so different from having only one child. My two girls are so close to each other and care so much for each other. Sophia said the other day: I am Marie’s Mommy (close Sophia;) ) How sweet!
    And, there is always audience, for any nonsense and for anything that could be fun. If it is just the cat food that could be used as confetti, just to entertain each other, or the tattoos that they draw on each other these days, both claiming with a straight face: “it wasn’t me” (markers all over their hands).
    You all will have so much fun with them!

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  • Chari | May 26th, 2011 8:03 am

    So happy to hear all is going well with your twins!! GIRLS how wonderful! They’ll be best friends. How is the rest of your family? I wrote to you back on your blog for Catholic Wispers. My daughter was the nurse who was doing IVF. I am so happy and excited to tell you that around 12/23 I will become a Grandmother. She is about to start her 11th week. We are all over the moon and so blessed! She had 15 eggs and 4 fertilized. They only transferred 1 because she is a nurse on her feet all day and as you know there is more risk carrying twins. They were are to freeze the other 3. It truly amazes me what medical science can do and the knowledge God allows. Thank you for allowing me to share my joy. I will continue to pray for you and your family. Enjoy this wonderful time in your lives. Looking forward to hearing updates about the twins and eventually pictures after they are born. Take Care.

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  • Carolyn Savage | May 28th, 2011 2:14 pm


    That is terrific news about your daughter and soon-to-be grandchild. Congratulations. I will keep all of them in my prayers. You take care too!

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  • Daryl | May 26th, 2011 11:59 am

    I was so happy to read the latest update! I am so happy for you all. You are all still in our thoughts and prayers daily. What a wonderful person Jennifer seems to be. She’s an angel here on Earth. Best wishes to you all

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  • tracy | May 27th, 2011 9:40 pm

    Yeah Jennifer you are awesome!!! Thank you for being the giving woman you are! We are praying for all of you! Can’t wait to see if that was a love tap OR a poke… looking at it from my side of the twin world gotta say poke!!!

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  • Laura | June 4th, 2011 5:44 am

    Carolyn and Sean,

    I recently finished your book and was in tears for many reasons at the end–one of which was that you were NOT pregnant and it didn’t seem likely that you would be. I am beyond delighted to read that you have twins happily growing (even interacting with each other) in Jennifer’s body and that soon they will be in your arms!!! You sound like such wonderful, giving people who were born to be parents. So very thankful that two more children will get to know the joy of your hearts and home. I will certainly keep the twins, Jennifer, the pregnancy and both of you in my prayers.

    Also, I’ve never subscribed to a blog before, but after finishing your book, I wanted to know MORE, so I think the blog will serve as my “fix”!! Can’t wait to read about all the recent happenings in your life! I’m quite sure there’s not a dull moment–which is how it should be! Blessings to both of you, Carolyn and Sean!

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  • robin | June 4th, 2011 10:41 am

    carolyn, i just finished your book this morning and wasted absolutely no time logging on to the website. you and sean are to be commended for your selfless act in doing what was right. i also was pleased by the way you thanked God and included Him in your story. i too am a Christ-follower and am always blessed to see others giving credit where it is due. i was drawn to this post because i celebrated my twin boys’ 9th bday on may 30th….though we did not endure IVF, i did have to take fertility drugs to conceive them. it was a long nine months for me (i went four days past my due date with them and had to be induced!), but it was worth the wait. i delivered two healthy baby boys — 7 lbs. 6 oz. and 9 lbs. 13 oz.! we broke records at the hospital and became instant celebrities in our hometown! one of my boys would not nurse properly though. so for two weeks i had to insert a small feeding tube into a bottle of formula, let him latch on to my breast, and slide the tube into the side of his mouth so he would learn to nurse. i look back on those days and wonder how i made it…but then, like you, i realize that God was always with me then. i admire your family and wish you the best with your current situation. may God richly bless you as you have blessed others!

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  • sarah | June 20th, 2011 9:25 am

    I read your book recently, as did a few people in my family. It was truly inspiring. My sister-in-law sent me this posting this morning, and it brought me to tears. I am so happy for you! I will surely have Jennifer and your little girls in my prayers! All the very best! – Sarah

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  • Carolyn Savage | June 20th, 2011 3:53 pm

    Hi Sarah, I’m so glad that you found our story inspiring. That’s why we wrote it. Please keep Jennifer and the twins in your prayers and stay-tuned to our blog and Facebook “Like” page for updates as their birth gets closer. We feel very blessed right now.

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  • Cindy | June 25th, 2011 1:44 am

    I am so thrilled for you both! Twin girls, what a blessing. Jennifer sounds like an angel sent from God. We will be praying for all of you.

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